Daddy's Li'l Girl

This February 18th, it'll be my dad's 59th birthday. I figured I'd share some of my meditations with you, as this blog is supposed to be a reflection of the Lord's work around me. And my daddy is one of the biggest reflectors of Christ I know.


My dad is an authentic man of God. I say that with no doubt, no hesitation, and an overwhelming sense of blessedness. Throughout my life, he has constantly shown me what it means to live out faith in Christ as a light in darkness. I see a world all around that's caught up living lives for personal gain, personal achievement, and personal glory. And a false notion for Christians that "ministry" is a series of events organized in a church building and funded by church-going people... but not according to him. 


Now, I should put a disclaimer in here before I go any further. My dad is by no means perfect. The problem with having great strengths is that the Lord pairs them with greater weaknesses to keep us in that precious and necessary posture of humility and insufficiency. And my dad has his fair share (that patched hole in the stairwell at our house is a reminder of that ;) ) We're all sinners who fall short, and he is no exception... But when I think of him, it's not those shortcomings that define him. 


You know what I see when I look at him?...


A man who takes care of orphans. (Isaiah 1:17) - He has given the majority of his life to youth who have had no earthly dads. As long as I can remember, we always had people in and out of our house, as he loved and cared for those in desperate need of a father, whether that was through emotional trials, substance abuse recovery, grief counseling, spiritual confusion, financial need or homelessness. I noticed about a week ago on our kitchen table a series of letters from a young guy serving a sentence in prison, but who wrote regularly to my dad, seeking his prayers, counsel, and love during that time. That stack was sitting right next to some documents for a set of girls who lost their mom tragically years ago, but for whom my parents, during the years since, have acted as unofficial guardians, through the good and the bad.


A man who guards the widow. (Deuteronomy 10:18) - As I sit upstairs right now, he is downstairs with my mom, after getting home late from work, helping a woman who lost her husband a few years ago do her taxes and navigate through difficult circumstances.


A man who teaches other men. (2 Timothy 2:2) - He spent the past weekend leading a retreat with a group of men from his church, sharing the gospel, teaching the scriptures, and learning together what it looks like to be men who fight for God and their families. These men started getting together weekly about a year ago to condemn passivity and learn from scripture what it means to be authentic men in every day life. Through this "Men's Fraternity," lives have been changed, men have stepped up, and others have come to know Christ as a result. 


A man who loves and protects his wife. (1 Peter 3:7)- I love the little moments I'm blessed to see, being back home for a little while. Him smiling to see my mom when she gets home; Them going grocery shopping together; Him reaching over to take her hand as we drive home from dinner out.


A man who both disciplines and delights in his children. (Ephesians 6:4) - I remember when I was little, whenever I was in serious trouble (which was rare, of course ;) ), he would bring me into their bedroom and ask me what I did, so I had to confess and acknowledge my need to be punished. Then I was put over his knee and spanked. But, immediately after, he would set me back up on his lap, brush away my tears, hug me and tell me how much he hated doing that and how much he loved me. Even today, though it's changed in form and substance, he's always there to give both the hard truth and the compassionate mercy I and my siblings need.


A man who hungers after the Word. (Psalm 119:14)- My mom asked me at one point, if my dad died, what would I want to make sure I kept as a memory of him. The only thing I could think of was his old, well-used NAS bible. I love hearing him tell me about how crazy Ezekiel was, or reminding me of Zephaniah 3:17 when I'm struggling, or randomly texting me about how relevant that part of Tozer's book or that sermon by Tommy Nelson is in his life.


A man who honors and fights for his country. (Romans 13:7)- He served 27 years in the Coast Guard, enlisting out of high school, in and out on deployments to sea when we were kids, and rising to the rank of Commander before retiring to work as a contractor. But even more than that, he works to live righteously as a citizen of his country. He doesn't dodge his taxes. He doesn't speed. He pays back what he borrowed. He respects and prays for his appointed leaders, whether he agrees with them or not.


I could keep going, but I'll stop with this. Recently, he and I were talking and somehow the topic of child-rearing came up. He shared a story he hadn't told me before. Some time ago, when both my sister and I were very young, he went to a men's conference, during which they talked about how to care for daughters. He was suddenly struck and weighed down by the heaviness of what it meant to be a daddy to a little girl; That her perceptions of men, of the world, of her own worth, and of her heavenly Father rested squarely and uniquely on the shoulders of her daddy. He told me that when he realized that, he broke down, knowing that he could never live up to all those expectations. He couldn't be what we needed. But rather than running scared, or giving up, he covenanted to pray for us and entrust us daily, along with himself, to his own perfect heavenly Father. He would do his best to love Jesus and live by grace through faith, and encourage us to do the same, come what may.


I have to say, that last part makes him more of a Godly man in my eyes than anything else. He's shown me what a worthy man looks like. I'm proud to be my daddy's li'l girl.


So happy birthday, daddy. :) Keep running your race as to win the prize, and know that I'm proud to be cheering you on.